SoCoolAZ.Com has obtain exclusive rights to this mock interview with Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas in regards to the appointment of Judge Sonia Sotomayor to the Supreme Court.

"I've heard that Sonia likes to fuck," opens Justice Thomas who is wearing khaki pants and a button down polo this Sunday afternoon in Missouri, "I've certainly contemplated what that wild wet-back bush might look like garnishing my Diet Coke."

Thomas, who was rigorously questioned about sexual harassment during his 1991 senate confirmation hearing has settled into a conservative bend for the nation's top court.  He has been vindicated from any wrong doing in the 1981 Anita Hill scandal which alleged Thomas hanky-panky office environment where sexual harassment was rampant and directed at Anita Hill. 

"I'm eager to discuss issues with Sotomayor and hope that she is open to some naked debate with group sex porn playing on my MacBook.  I'll write all about our first year together in my followup memoir titled Pubic Hair and Soda Pop."

Sotomayor, who was grilled today by Republican law makers has insisted that her comment about the "Wise Latina" was only meant to inspire young Latina into a life of cock-sucking and house cleaning.  She stands firmly on the side of marijuana legalization and will defend a woman's right to have doctors dig out a fetus from a mother's womb the day before scheduled birth.  She has worked as a border Coyote, has ties to the Juarez Cartel and is an advocate for short people.  She plans a Jenny Craig commercial after being confirmed.